...If you are not my cyber or corporeal girlfriend, click away while you still can.
The baby has an ear infection. I am relieved that it is only an ear infection, because she had a strange cough and a little fever and I called the nurse like a weenie, I mean first-time mom, and asked whether I should worry.
You know you never should do that. You should either worry or just drive in to the doctor already, because the nurse will look at your chart and say, "holy birth control, the woman has four kids, if she's calling, she needs to come in."
So then you will drive like a maniac to get to town on time for the doctor who will make you wait 20 to 1200 minutes. Then the baby will want to nurse right when you're supposed to be stripping her nakie for the cold cruel scale.
Then you'll find out it's an ear infection and -- even worse -- that they don't give antibiotics anymore for ear infections, that's just so outdated now, it's better to let it run its course. Of course.
Then your left boobie will explode with the pressure because the baby can't nurse on that side because it hurts her.
You can't say I didn't warn you it would get ugly. Thanks for reading.
3 comments:
ROFLOL @ "Holy birth control"
My doctor gets nervous when I bring in one of my kids... they are starting to ask my advice on what to do. Oh brother!
I feel your pain... not literally, but I can remember it well! It's a miracle I still have both breasts attached, but I have what's called the "post-almost-exploding phenomena", also known as sag.
I love the looks I get from the cute, little, young nurses when they discover I have 6 children, 9 pregnancies. I always get "Well, you should be telling us what to do." So fun.
Hope ears (and boobies) are feeling better soon.
P. S. Grabbing Dr. by lab coat and saying through clenched teeth and wild eyes "give me drugs" may result in prescription for antibiotics.
ROFLOL at all the mommy comments!
Ahh, the days of exploding boobies!.......
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