Thursday, May 8, 2008

I Don't Know How To Say This

Um... there's a bottle of Jim Beam, or Jack Daniels, or one of those guy-name medicinals, clearly visible in the "before" picture of my kitchen. I think it's against the law to show that without a liquor license.

Someone pointed it out to me ever so politely at my email address. I will just go die of mortification now. If you need something funny to read in my absence, well, I was going to point you to a good blog, but I realize I am selfish. I need all the readership I can get because I'll probably lose everyone once they see the evidence of my problem.

I'm not a drinker though. Unless you count aspartame soda. Diet Coke, that's my thing. I had the liquor bottle to display daffodils in. It's really true, and I guess you can believe me or not. They looked so cute and DaisyDukeish without me having to bare my thighs and freak out the neighbors.

One time my super-frugal, law-abiding, sweet little Finnish Grandma was going to make beer bread from her family recipe, but she was too embarrassed to buy the beer in our small-town grocery store, so she paid a teenager to go in and buy it for her. The horrors if someone from church were to see her in the aisle with a case of Bud. And then our sheriff cousin caught her soliciting a minor to buy alcohol.

The bread was really good. She had to supply the whole jail.

But I've been thinking about politics. I won't even try to get into a what-do-you-call-it-endorsement here what with not knowing who I support if anyone. I'm just saying, we should all be as up-front as me, even if it's, um, accidental. It's so much better to come clean, don't you agree?

Feel free to comment ... I'll be moving my blog over to AA now.

9 comments:

Chickie Momma said...

Ok, either I'm not seeing the evidence, or what I am seeing is a FULL bottle. hahahahaha!! Maybe a little photoshop action can clear up this incident.

Don't worry, we won't leave you over one offense!

The grandma buying beer story reminds me of my own mother... Mr Nice Guy told her to go to the store to buy beer because he was going to come down and cook 'em up some beer battered halibut. It was hilarious... and wouldn't you know it, the woman who has never bought alchohol in her ENTIRE life gets busted at the door carrying a six pack of beer by the church blabbermouth. HAHA! I can't say who it was, because some people here know said blabbermouth. LOL!

the160acrewoods said...

laughing hysterically... now i have to go back and look! that's so silly.. you really can't show booze in your photo's? i've never heard that before... but i'm oblivious to most things!
If it makes you feel better, we have peppermint schnapps in the cupboard, something we like with our hot chocolate in the winter (only hubby and me lol.. not the kids!)

Misty said...

so wait... when I post my kitchen photos, should i NOT include a photo of my liquor cabinet??? My wine rack will show...
Is it proper just to put a warning ??? :)

Toni said...

Yeah, so I went back to check out the picture again. I enlarged them, and honey, that bottle is not ready for flowers yet!

Then I started noticing things. The kids school pictures on the fridge turned out really good. Hey, I like that tin on top of the fridge. Is that a cherry design on it. Oh look, the drawers have knobs that look like cherries. Is that a cherry mug, teapot and salt/sugar shaker on the stove? I think I'm noticing a theme here.

I think this is why my Nacho won't let me post any pictures. He is very paranoid that someone will memorize the picture and come looking for us.

Your kitchen looks very cozy, like I would love to come and visit and escape from my house for an hour or two. And it doesn't have anything to do with the liquor on the counter!

Chickie Momma said...

Ok so I hope you're in a good mood. I couldn't resist doing a special post just about your *ahem* VASE...

farm suite said...

It gets better and better! The bottle on the counter is not the daffodil bottle but the margarita necessity. Ay yi yi.

My husband is paranoid too. I even had to take out what state we live in. Of course, you and I know no one is going to want to break in my house to steal cherry paraphernalia!

Farm Chick said...

They might, however, come a lookin' for the Jose' bottle! ROFLOL! You forgot the daffodil bottle is the Jack Daniels one. OMGoodness. Thank heavens I conviently left out my liquor shelf, in the kitchen pic's. Hahah!

P.S.
I had nothing to do with Chickie's post! Promise. Bwahahaha!

Chickie Momma said...

Farm Chick made me do it

farm suite said...

You all are very funny. It is verified by me, the Queen of Comedy Judgment. I dub thee funny.