Like everything around you is upside down, inside out, and topsy turvy to boot?
Did you ever wonder why we say "to boot"? That one I'll have to say turned me around all by itself. Wikipedia couldn't even help. What? No help from the all-knowing Wikipedia? It is dire indeed.
We started homeschool again today. Madeleine's reading assignment was titled oh-so-cleverly "Punctuality and Punctuation." I took offense at the humor. I won't tell you which subject bothered me more. Let's just say I enjoyed the discussion on ellipses but it made us late.
It seems as though the rest of the world went back to school yesterday. And I'm just contrary.
We had some fun over the holiday break. We visited Santa Rosa and San Francisco and played with piles of cousins near and far. We were snowed in at our little farmhouse for days on end. We played a lot of Scrabble... and chess... and dress-up. We spent too much time with the dog.
I wish Maiya would snap her fingers at my phone company. Surely they'd listen to such a force as my glittery niece.
I have spent the better part of today in most encouraging conversations with tech support personnel who are not native to our nation. Our land line has been out for about a week. That is, one of our land lines has been out while the dedicated internet line hummed right along. Small mercies.
This was all well and good while the cell towers were still standing and delivering signals.
So today I was expecting a nice repairperson to look into the mysterious problem of no dial tone on my all-important connection to calling my husband to pick up milk on the way home.
Well, I was sort of expecting someone, in that cable-guy way that means you don't make any other plans to breathe or anything for a 24-hour window of time so as to ensure that the person shows up when you're changing a messy diaper and the teakettle is simultaneously screaming.
But this is misleading. I didn't wake up today expecting to wait on the repairperson. No, I had an appointment for today that was canceled last night. Are you following? Because I barely am, and I've been here.
Last night, well after dark, a repairperson stopped at my house to say that someone had given me a new "box" during the course of the day and that I was all fixed up. Oh, thank you, thank you, I gushed. I am not kidding when I say the girls gave the man warm chocolate chip cookies for his long drive back into the city.
I did mention to him that we had not been home, as our appointment wasn't for yesterday but TODAY. He said it wasn't a problem, they hadn't needed access to our house.
This morning I woke to no dial tone. Feeling curious, I walked outside to inspect my new box. Hmm. Should a new box be rusty inside?
I didn't think so either.
Thus began another day of tech support calls and too little time on the internet since I had to use that line to convince the usual ladder of folks in India that my phone was not yet fixed.
Then (it gets better and better) I decided to tackle the chore of reporting that our cell phones haven't worked anywhere near home for a while now... only to find that our cell provider has been purchased by our (you guessed it) land line company. Can anyone say Ma Bell? (Bonus points if it's in other languages.)
More importantly: Don't they know they're interfering with my precious blog reading time?